Discussion:
Been watching this group..... is it officially dead?
(too old to reply)
Evelyn
2010-12-07 11:40:02 UTC
Permalink
Hi all,

I have been checking in on this group from time to time, and there have been
no new posts with the exception of a few cross posts.

How is everyone?

As an update, my father has dementia now, but it is vascular dementia, not
true alzheimers.

His doctor has him on a very small dose of Aricept, which helps a little.
He is obsessed with small things, and very paranoid and difficult to deal
with. My sister and I went to an elder law attorney to discuss the
situation, and we need to somehow get him to provide one of us with a POA.
My father is not interested in doing this, which could create a very chaotic
situation if his illness advances further, as it inevitably will.

There is a type of POA which ONLY kicks in if two doctors say the person is
not capable of making his own decisions. We are hoping that he can be
persuaded to sign this one. We will have to pay the attorney to draw it
up, and my father would be the client whom the attorney is representing in
this process.

Should that fail, we may have to go for guardianship.

We are waiting a little longer, since he is presently hanging on OK, but
that could change at any minute. He's 97 and will be 98 in a few months.
Why oh why are people so sure they will live forever and not want to assure
their loved ones that they can make necessary decisions for them if
circumstances warrant it?

My mother in law was just as bad. She hung on until the situation became
very critical before she realized that she needed paperwork in place to
protect her interests and make decisions for her.

I guess nobody ever expects that they will develop dementia, but the actual
numbers don't support that.


Best Regards,
Evelyn

In the stony fastness of the mountains there is a strange market, where one
may barter the vortex of life for boundless bliss. – Milarepa
Adelle
2010-12-07 13:29:33 UTC
Permalink
Post by Evelyn
Hi all,
I have been checking in on this group from time to time, and there have
been no new posts with the exception of a few cross posts.
How is everyone?
As an update, my father has dementia now, but it is vascular dementia, not
true alzheimers.
His doctor has him on a very small dose of Aricept, which helps a little.
He is obsessed with small things, and very paranoid and difficult to deal
with. My sister and I went to an elder law attorney to discuss the
situation, and we need to somehow get him to provide one of us with a POA.
My father is not interested in doing this, which could create a very
chaotic situation if his illness advances further, as it inevitably will.
There is a type of POA which ONLY kicks in if two doctors say the person
is not capable of making his own decisions. We are hoping that he can be
persuaded to sign this one. We will have to pay the attorney to draw it
up, and my father would be the client whom the attorney is representing in
this process.
Should that fail, we may have to go for guardianship.
We are waiting a little longer, since he is presently hanging on OK, but
that could change at any minute. He's 97 and will be 98 in a few months.
Why oh why are people so sure they will live forever and not want to
assure their loved ones that they can make necessary decisions for them if
circumstances warrant it?
My mother in law was just as bad. She hung on until the situation became
very critical before she realized that she needed paperwork in place to
protect her interests and make decisions for her.
I guess nobody ever expects that they will develop dementia, but the
actual numbers don't support that.
Not officially dead - I hope.

After Alan said he'd post the list of helpful hints periodically, I thought
weekly or monthly post would be superfluous. I can repost the message if
people want.

Adelle
Alan Holbrook
2010-12-08 10:09:56 UTC
Permalink
Yeah, Alan did say that didn't he? Frankly, the contributions didn't
take life the way I hoped they would, and there really didn't seem to be
much reason to re-post the small list I compiled. And I've had the same
concern that Evelyn voices. I haven't seen any action on this group
from anyone other than our friend with the "magnetic" personality in
quite a while.

My involvement with Alzheimer's these days is pretty much dedicated to
finding time for my volunteer work at my local Alzheimer's Association
chapter in Massachusetts. I've wormed my way onto the Advocacy and
Policy committee and become the self-appointed PITA for Young Onset
Alzheimer's Disease. I needed to find someone fresh to yell at about
the lack of attention for YOAD after you guys got to be just too
sympathetic and weren't much fun anymore <your choice of smiley here...>
Post by Adelle
Post by Evelyn
Hi all,
I have been checking in on this group from time to time, and there
have been no new posts with the exception of a few cross posts.
How is everyone?
actual numbers don't support that.
<snip>
Post by Adelle
Not officially dead - I hope.
After Alan said he'd post the list of helpful hints periodically, I
thought weekly or monthly post would be superfluous. I can repost the
message if people want.
Adelle
Adelle
2010-12-08 15:15:10 UTC
Permalink
Post by Alan Holbrook
Yeah, Alan did say that didn't he? Frankly, the contributions didn't
take life the way I hoped they would, and there really didn't seem to be
much reason to re-post the small list I compiled. And I've had the same
concern that Evelyn voices. I haven't seen any action on this group
from anyone other than our friend with the "magnetic" personality in
quite a while.
My involvement with Alzheimer's these days is pretty much dedicated to
finding time for my volunteer work at my local Alzheimer's Association
chapter in Massachusetts. I've wormed my way onto the Advocacy and
Policy committee and become the self-appointed PITA for Young Onset
Alzheimer's Disease. I needed to find someone fresh to yell at about
the lack of attention for YOAD after you guys got to be just too
sympathetic and weren't much fun anymore <your choice of smiley here...>
LOL

Well, I may not be an eternal optimist, but I hate to give up.

I'll post the usual message - but I need to figure out how to reword it a
little, as per our previous conversations.

Adelle
EddyJean
2010-12-15 17:26:25 UTC
Permalink
Alan,
You've made a good choice bringing attention to Young Onset Alzheimer's
Disease and wish you success. The ridiculous assumption that ages in the
thirties is the youngest reported with Alzheimer's simply don't know
what they're talking about. Many are born with the disease, struggling
with it most of their life because doctors don't know how to diagnose it
until its too late, treat it, (except guess), and no effective medicine
to stop the progression in the formerly richest country in the world.

EddyJean
Lynn Lynn
2010-12-10 14:02:10 UTC
Permalink
Hi everyone!


I'm still here. I drop in every now and then to see if anyone has
"stopped by" for advice or comforting.

Evelyn, thanks for the update on your Dad. Thankfully, Mom signed all
the papers prior to her developing dementia. I had mine made up several
years ago. Now I realize how important it is to be prepared and I'm
glad I did so.

I truly hope this group does not "go away". It has been such a comfort
to me (and still is).

Lynn
Paula
2011-01-01 20:25:49 UTC
Permalink
Hello Evelyn,

The group is not "Dead".
We are experiencing the same issues. We were fortunate enough to get a
lawyer that is a "Commissioner of the Court".
If you can retain a lawyer that has those credentials you would be far
ahead. They are usually older lawyers.
The advantage is, that what ever a "Commissioner of the Court" signs, it can
not be changed, or reverted. Once a "Commissioner of the Court" signs a
paper, it is as good as going through the court system. NO COURT HEARINGS!!
That in itself will save a 1/2 year.
Please feel free to email me, maybe we can assist each other.

Thank You,
Paula
***@live.com

"Evelyn" wrote in message news:idl6ek$t2c$***@news.eternal-september.org...

Hi all,

I have been checking in on this group from time to time, and there have been
no new posts with the exception of a few cross posts.

How is everyone?

As an update, my father has dementia now, but it is vascular dementia, not
true alzheimers.

His doctor has him on a very small dose of Aricept, which helps a little.
He is obsessed with small things, and very paranoid and difficult to deal
with. My sister and I went to an elder law attorney to discuss the
situation, and we need to somehow get him to provide one of us with a POA.
My father is not interested in doing this, which could create a very chaotic
situation if his illness advances further, as it inevitably will.

There is a type of POA which ONLY kicks in if two doctors say the person is
not capable of making his own decisions. We are hoping that he can be
persuaded to sign this one. We will have to pay the attorney to draw it
up, and my father would be the client whom the attorney is representing in
this process.

Should that fail, we may have to go for guardianship.

We are waiting a little longer, since he is presently hanging on OK, but
that could change at any minute. He's 97 and will be 98 in a few months.
Why oh why are people so sure they will live forever and not want to assure
their loved ones that they can make necessary decisions for them if
circumstances warrant it?

My mother in law was just as bad. She hung on until the situation became
very critical before she realized that she needed paperwork in place to
protect her interests and make decisions for her.

I guess nobody ever expects that they will develop dementia, but the actual
numbers don't support that.


Best Regards,
Evelyn

In the stony fastness of the mountains there is a strange market, where one
may barter the vortex of life for boundless bliss. – Milarepa
Adelle
2011-01-02 01:16:35 UTC
Permalink
Paula - In what jurisdiction do you live?
That sounds interesting, but I am not familiar with it as being in existence
in Massachusetts, though we do have Masters - retired judges in front of
whom you can have uncontested matters heard. Their decisions have the same
affect as any other court.

Adelle
Post by Paula
Hello Evelyn,
The group is not "Dead".
We are experiencing the same issues. We were fortunate enough to get a
lawyer that is a "Commissioner of the Court".
If you can retain a lawyer that has those credentials you would be far
ahead. They are usually older lawyers.
The advantage is, that what ever a "Commissioner of the Court" signs, it
can not be changed, or reverted. Once a "Commissioner of the Court" signs
a paper, it is as good as going through the court system. NO COURT
HEARINGS!! That in itself will save a 1/2 year.
Please feel free to email me, maybe we can assist each other.
Thank You,
Paula
Hi all,
I have been checking in on this group from time to time, and there have been
no new posts with the exception of a few cross posts.
How is everyone?
As an update, my father has dementia now, but it is vascular dementia, not
true alzheimers.
His doctor has him on a very small dose of Aricept, which helps a little.
He is obsessed with small things, and very paranoid and difficult to deal
with. My sister and I went to an elder law attorney to discuss the
situation, and we need to somehow get him to provide one of us with a POA.
My father is not interested in doing this, which could create a very chaotic
situation if his illness advances further, as it inevitably will.
There is a type of POA which ONLY kicks in if two doctors say the person is
not capable of making his own decisions. We are hoping that he can be
persuaded to sign this one. We will have to pay the attorney to draw it
up, and my father would be the client whom the attorney is representing in
this process.
Should that fail, we may have to go for guardianship.
We are waiting a little longer, since he is presently hanging on OK, but
that could change at any minute. He's 97 and will be 98 in a few months.
Why oh why are people so sure they will live forever and not want to assure
their loved ones that they can make necessary decisions for them if
circumstances warrant it?
My mother in law was just as bad. She hung on until the situation became
very critical before she realized that she needed paperwork in place to
protect her interests and make decisions for her.
I guess nobody ever expects that they will develop dementia, but the actual
numbers don't support that.
Best Regards,
Evelyn
In the stony fastness of the mountains there is a strange market, where one
may barter the vortex of life for boundless bliss. - Milarepa
Bohgosity BumaskiL
2011-09-03 02:17:13 UTC
Permalink
On 2010-12-07 4:40 AM, Evelyn wrote:
(...)
Post by Evelyn
There is a type of POA which ONLY kicks in if two doctors say the
person is not capable of making his own decisions. We are hoping
that he can be persuaded to sign this one. We will have to pay
the attorney to draw it up, and my father would be the client whom
the attorney is representing in this process.
(...)

Even before he signs it, that is how it is in many if not
most states and provinces, so I guess the point in having
him sign it is to accept the law.
_______
Dyslexic Borg: Prepare to be ass-laminated.

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